Qantas Airlines was forced to cancel flights yesterday due to four baby pythons that had escaped on a passenger plane in Australia. Yikes! This is all too familiar with Samuel L. Jackson's movie, Snakes on a Plane.
Granted, the baby pythons were only a half foot long, they did not pose a threat as the pheromone laced snakes in the movie. But, the very thought of these little guys loose on a plane is enough to send shivers up and down my spine. You see, I suffer from snake phobia.
Then why on earth do I live in the middle of the desert where the Western Diamondback Rattler is king? Trust me, I ask myself this question daily especially now when snakes are making their way from their winter dens. I even believe these creatures hold conventions and pass around my picture as "the" perfect victim. They are all out there laying and waiting for me to walk by so they can get their jollies by scaring the shit out of me.
Just who do they think they are? They coil up and strike the classic pose which makes my heart race, gives me tunnel vision and causes me to wet my pants. I won't even walk where grass is any higher than my ankles for fear there is not just one snake, but at least 30. And, they are all waiting there just for me.
Anyway, when I read the news of the lost snakes yesterday, I thought about how these snakes go from eating a small mouse to eventually swallowing a baby hippo. Good googly moogly! Now just where did these snakes go? And, is it so common that snakes are transported by passenger airliners? Well, snakes or no snakes, I'll never fly again.
I rest my case.