Monday, December 14, 2009

The Fractured ABC's Of Christmas - M



M
is for Mistletoe
Standing under here, folks take the cue

Here comes the guy with herpes

Now, what will you do?



Are you attending an office holiday party and getting stressed out about it? Are you not sure how you're supposed to act, or what is expected of you at these events? Don't fret, here are a few tips to help you enjoy yourself.

1. Location - Hold your party at a venue that is comfortable and appropriate for everyone. Sorry guys, Hooters is definitely out.

2. Dress Code - Consult with your co-workers before hand. You don't want to be the only one wearing an elf sweater and earrings with blinking Rudolph noses when everyone else is in sleek suits.

3. Don't Drink Too Much - Even small quantities of booze can loosen inhibitions and lead you to do things you'll wish you hadn't, like Xeroxing your butt. You really don't want copies posted in every cubicle the next day.

What is your best advice when attending a holiday office party?

18 comments:

  1. Well, my office is at my house, so my party will be with kids and juice boxes.

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  2. Rule #4 Don't forget to put on any fake body parts: teeth, leg prostheis, fake boobs.

    Berra berra important.

    Ha!

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  3. Self-employment means never having to say you're sorry. Of course, the office parties are rather boring.

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  4. You're #1, you're #1! Wahoo. WTG, Me-Me.

    My office is my couch. The party's been underway for 3 days now. Zzzzzz...

    P.S. Who told you about my cold sore?

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  5. Avoid them. Unless you're a blogger than you should attend and where your best jammies.

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  6. Don't - whatever you are thinking of doing or saying - Just don't!

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  7. Show up just in time to pick up your Christmas bonus check, steal a bottle of booze, then get the hell out of Dodge...

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  8. Just don't go! If you have to attend, make sure you sneak into the party late, after every one is good and drunk, with a look-a-like inflatable doll, then leave it propped up by the bar with a drink in hand. Thanks for visiting Think Spin.

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  9. I usually wear sleek suits to everything. In an effort to out-sleek everyone else, I've recently been resorting to wetsuits. They look good, but I'm not sure all the vaseline is worth it.

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  10. mistletoe doesnt taste as good as it looks. just putting that out there

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  11. seems my idea of just not going has already been taken. I work in a grocery store and our party is in the stockroom while you're on break so pretty much that day I'm on break all day. Hey someone has to be in charge of keeping things in order.

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  12. We are partying it up here at La Casa di Romano. No dangers in being overserved when you are on the couch at home! :D

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  13. Yeah our Christams parties are a bit tame too. I work at a preschool. So we have our party with the kids.

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  14. Well believe me I can tell stories about what not to do at an office X-mas party and they all involve too much alcohol.

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  15. Don't sit next to the guy with the roving hands.

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  16. Limiting the alcohol intake is the biggie. At a work party, a certain degree of professionalism is still necessary.

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  17. Damn, I wish I'd read #3 last week

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