1. Send spouse to Alaska to capture moose, or have one delivered by UPS.
2. Meanwhile, melt chocolate in very large double boiler.
3. Keep warm.
4. Tie up moose with rope.
5. Holding the moose by the tail, carefully dip in melted chocolate, covering it completely with a thin coating.
6. Arrange moose attractively on large platter and refrigerate for 2 days to set chocolate.
7. Remove rope, wash to remove chocolate,if necessary, and return rope to clothesline.
8. Garnish chocolate moose with Cool Whip and top with a cherry.
9. Serve immediately.
10. Or you could just chew on the rope, which may be tastier.
11. May be doubled for serving a crowd.
UDDERLY WONDERFUL ECLAIRS
- 2 fresh lean cow udders
- 1 pint whipping cream
- 1 cup brown sugar
- 1 (14 ounce) can artichoke hearts
- 1/2 cup butter
- 1 small smelt, filleted
1. Soak the cow udders in Nair to remove the hair. Repeat several times if necessary until all hair is removed. Rinse in warm water.
2. Place a stick of butter into a warm frying pan. Wait until all of the butter has melted, then add the cow udders. Fry them for 15-20 minutes until golden brown.
3. Chop the artichoke hearts and smelt on a cutting board into fine pieces.
4. In a large bowl, add the whipping cream, brown sugar and the chopped artichokes, and smelt.
5. With a mixer on low, whip until creamy with a consistency like vanilla pudding.
6. Remove the udders from the pan and make a long slice down the side of each udder.
7. Spread the pudding mixture into each slit. Serve warm or cold and have an "Udderly Wonderful" snack.
KID'S TIME-OUT LUNCH
- 1 Slice whole wheat bread
- 1 Glass water
1. Place bread on a steel prison lunch tray.
2. Place glass of water out until it is room temperature.
3. Serve to misbehaving child and say in your best parental tones,"Kids in Botswana would be proud to have so much"!
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