Friday, April 24, 2009

Ode To Vince, The Poem

Today is a very special day. It is the birthday of Offer "Vince" Shlomi, Mr. ShamWow. In honor of his birthday, I am participating in the Humor Bloggers' ShamWow Carnival and have written a poem to commemorate this momentous occasion.  Happy birthday to Vince, happy birthday to Vince......

Ode To Vince, The Poem
by The Screaming Me-Me!!!

Everyone everywhere knows of Vince
He’s the one that tries to convince
Each and every household with TVs
That we really must have one of these!

It’s not a towel or a rag you see
It’s a magical cloth from Germany
Soaking up its weight in cola and wine
Look how that counter top begins to shine!

Now, Vince isn’t really much of a looker
He wanted a woman, so he bought a hooker
She bit his tongue, oh what a bloody mess
There was blood, even on the hooker’s dress!

Now Vince sits, I hear he’s doing time
His once golden voice isn’t worth a dime
Don’t dare ask me where, when or how
Who will now sell the magical ShamWow?

Copyright 2009

Click here for more from the HumorBloggers ShamWow Carnival


  1. You should get that published. Or maybe the poem could go on that wrapper that goes around the ShamWow. Isn't that a great idea?? You're welcome.

  2. @ Da Old Man - Thank you! *MMM bows*

    @ Mary@Holy Mackerel - Brilliant, I give to permission to act as my agent!

  3. Brilliant. Bloody brilliant (sorry, Vince).

  4. Love it.

    Here's a little haiku to go with it.

    No more ShamWow now
    What has Vince left in his life?
    Hookers, and jail.

  5. LOL, now that is freakin' it!

  6. @ Chris - Glad you enjoyed my tribute!

    @ freetheunicorns - LOL! Thanks for the haiku, poor Vince.

    @ misstfied - It's hilarious when art imitates life.

  7. You have brought honor to not only Vince's birthday, but all of Germany with that poem.

  8. Nice job MeMe! I lurve it. I try to wax poetic as often as I can.


  9. That poem brought tears to my eyes. If only I had a ShamWow to dry my tears!

  10. You had me at "convince". That was a good chuckle...

  11. I just wonder if he used the ShamWow to soak up the blood from his tongue.

  12. That poem is hilarious!

    Girl, you got skills!

    Dr. Suess ain't got nothin' on you.


    Eat Well. Live Well.

  13. That was a great poem! I love your blog. Nice to meet you ME ME...Thanks for coming to see my site; now, what do i owe you and where do i send it?

  14. Poor ol' Vince. Boo hoo. I could tell he was a sleazeball the first time I saw him hawking his Super Towel.

  15. Brilliant! I see a laureate in your future (since you already have a lariat).


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